the wheel turns...

I am feeling pretty distant at the moment. My computer is not being used, I check blogs and emails less and less, and I am reading a lot more. I am starting to go out to Hope Valley when I'm not working, doing whatever needs doing, and I found myself exploring the forests in the back part of the camp. Its so peaceful to be alone, and yet I know I am not supposed to shut myself away for the summer... I've been cruising through 'the Wheel of Time' series by Robert Jordan, which has been fascinating and phenomenal, as usual. Probably the best thing about the series is that Jordan really understands people, their flaws, the different perspectives they have, and their motives for doing things. By the way, I've decided all girls are masters of Daes Dae'mar which means I should probably just run away and hide, or stop smiling... I wish the dice would stop rolling in my head. I think I will get back to work, and write a song.

Does 'Daughter of the Nine Moons' mean anything to you? -Mat Cauthon

birds...

4:13. That is when the first Robin starts chirping. With a soft rainfall on a warm morning the sound of a Robin singing is quite soothing. Night shifts become all the more pleasant when a Robin greets you in the early morning hours.

O Christ in Thee my soul hath found

The Lord has been using this hymn, and a message Andy Bowes preached from the book of James, to make me think about how much I really love Jesus compared with how much I love other things. As my previous post suggested, I've had a week or two to realize that I crave a whole lot of things over Jesus. So its time to kill the cravings I think. And I'm more a fan of the 'cold turkey' approach versus the 'smoker's patch' approach. Pay particular attention to verse 4.

-todd.


O Christ in Thee my soul hath found

1
O Christ, in Thee my soul hath found, and found in Thee alone,
the peace, the joy, I sought so long, the bliss till now unknown.

Now none but Christ can satisfy, none other Name for me!
There’s love, and life, and lasting joy, Lord Jesus, found in Thee!

2
I sighed for rest and happiness, I yearned for them, not Thee,
but while I passed my Saviour by, His love laid hold on me.

3
I tried the broken cisterns, Lord, but, ah! the waters failed!
E’en as I stooped to drink they fled and mocked me as I wailed.

4
The pleasures lost I sadly mourned, but never wept for Thee,
till grace the sightless eyes received Thy loveliness to see.

Solitude

So I have been thinking recently, after observing an interesting phenomenon in this culture, that solitude is something I will seek after more in the future. Good old fashion alone time, be it throwing a frisbee, or reading a book, or taking a walk, whatever. I come to this conclusion after observing many people react stunned at the thought that I did something by myself, with that purpose in mind. Isn't it kind of weird that the first question someone asks you when you tell them you went to play frisbee golf is: Who with?
The Lord has blessed me this past week in allowing me to experience alone time, and to be honest I pretty much wasted a lot of it trying to figure out what to do with myself. Then I realized that it truly is a gift from God to be able to spend a day or a week by yourself (not that you don't see or talk to people, but that you don't plan for it, or need it). So I began reading books more and more, and downloaded more sermons by John Piper on Romans. I believe this is an area of my life I would like to improve in. Spending my alone time wisely and profitably, unworried about hanging out with people so much.
For it is in solitude that I will really know God. Not just in an intellectual way, but in that deep loving way which is found in a quiet field of flowers, or on a hill of grass, where the soul can reflect and be truly satisfied in Jesus. He leads me beside still waters, he restores my soul. My current favourite song from Caedmon's Call is "Walk with Me", which speaks to my heart each time I play it, or hear it. I realize that many of you are extremely busy with work, but I would encourage you to use the time you have wisely, seek out the Lord in the stillness of solitude, if the Lord grants you the time. And believe me, if you desire to be quiet with Jesus, he will give you that time.

'Walk with me empty, walk with me strong
The hush of our voices, when the day seems so long.
It is like a balm, it is like a jewel, it unravels all i thought i knew...'

Heaven's Abode

C F
The Christ of the cross is drawing nigh,
F C G
A face like the sun in glory will come.
C F
And when my dear King calls my name
F C G F C
This world I will leave for ultimate gain, for ultimate gain.

As waves of doubt crash surfs of faith,
I'm held by the promises in his word.
Mornings may come when I slip again,
I was bought with His blood before time began, before time began.

And I know that its not my job to ask
But do friendships like these flourish or fail?
I'm scared to hold on and take a blow
Or let go and lose what friendships I'd known, what friendships I'd known.

With the heart set on Christ and a life that shows
The majesty of his beauty alone.
This clock though it ticks but very slow,
Will no longer matter in Heaven's Abode, in Heaven's Abode...